WASHINGTON—In an effort to assuage any fears over the constitutionality of the Trump administration’s flurry of executive actions, a D.C.-area think tank called The Himmler Institute reportedly assured the nation Monday that this is all perfectly legal. “We’ve studied the total legality of far-reaching executive actions for decades, and we can guarantee that everything happening in Washington right now is completely above board,” said Himmler Institute spokesperson Stephanie Heydrich-Skorzeny, adding that this was one of the clearest-cut cases the Institute had seen since its founding in 1947. “We’ve put together some of the brightest legal minds America, Germany, and Argentina have ever produced, and they’ve concluded that there’s no reason to worry about the current situation resulting in any sort of constitutional crisis. These executive orders are nothing more than a simple and effective way to seize power. If anything, Trump’s actions are merely reversing the illegal actions of past administrations who betrayed the American people to promote gender ideology and race mixing.” At press time, The Himmler Institute’s findings were backed up by a report from another think tank called The Führerprinzip Foundation.
